NP0021 The 6 Most Challenging Issues in Therapy

This blog focuses on discussion regarding the course NP0021 The 6 Most Challenging Issues in Therapy... and How Therapists Can Overcome Them.

Treating the Narcissistic Client with Wendy Behary


The 6 Most Challenging Issues in Therapy: NP0021 - Session 3

Explore a treatment plan for clients with narcissistic personality disorder that helps you maintain compassion while achieving leverage. Wendy Behary, author of Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed, teaches how to use tactical confrontation, cognitive restructuring, behavioral therapy and skills training, experiential psychotherapy, and more.

After you hear this presentation, please take a few minutes to comment about what you found most interesting or relevant, to ask any questions you have of the presenter or your colleagues, or to share any experiences. As always, if you ever have any technical questions, please feel free to email support@psychotherapynetworker.org and our Support Team will help you.

07.05.2012   Posted In: NP0021 The 6 Most Challenging Issues in Therapy   By Psychotherapy Networker
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  • 0 avatar Constance Kehrer 07.05.2012 13:23
    Wow is right. Behary is a pro. Thanks for a wonderful presentation!
  • Not available avatar Joy Lang 07.06.2012 12:27
    Another wow! That was a fantastic presentation. Thank you so very much for the practical tips in working with narcissists. You have certainly triggered a recognition of why I am not making any headway with one of the clients I have currently, and why I have felt like there is so much behind the wall I just couldn't get to. I really appreciated this presentation.
  • Not available avatar Carolyn 07.06.2012 15:52
    That had to be one of the best presentations I have witnessed this summer. Oh baby!!! That was incredible. I had to pause at least 3 times because I did not want to miss a second. I am not sure if you will have time to read this Wendy, I was wondering about the adolescent client who may have "flavors" of this. What are easy starting points where some self reflection can take place? Thank you so much- Incredible Work!!!
    • Not available avatar Wendy Behary 07.07.2012 16:37
      Hi Carolyn --
      This is an excellent question!
      Differentiating between "normal" developmental adolescent narcissism, and the burgeoning pathological narcissism of our era, is an important investigation nowadays. The acceleration of instant gratification opportunities, given technologically induced mechanisms for "I want it now, I get it now" outcomes, certainly play a role in the emerging predictable epidemic of (very) low frustration/discomfort tolerance in our young people. Using imagination and empathy training is becoming ever more important in our treatment repertoire for slowing down the express-train mind of the adolescent, allowing them to take in the scenery (feelings and experiences of themselves and others)along the way.
      Thanks for the thoughtful question!
      Warmest Wishes,
  • Not available avatar Wendy Behary 07.06.2012 16:20
    Thank you for the very generous feedback!
    I appreciate you for taking the time to write.
    So happy the webcast was helpful to you...
    Thanks for watching
    All the best,

    Wendy T. Behary, Director
    The Cognitive Therapy Center Of NJ
    The NJ Institute For Schema Therapy
    President, International Society for Schema Therapy (ISST)
    28 Millburn Avenue, Suite 7-A
    Springfield, New Jersey 07081, USA
    (973) 218-1776 x807
    Specializing in Issues of Narcissism - www.disarmingthenarcissist.com
    Training, Supervision, and Consultation available
    • Not available avatar Carol 07.09.2012 10:44
      Wendy...your presentation was enlightening! I love your language of treatment! I'm a true believer in the thought that there is always something new to learn, especially from our life stories. Thank you!
  • 0 avatar Libby Gell 07.06.2012 18:49
    Thanks so much, Wendy. That really pulled together ideas about and approaches to narcissism that I have gathered over the years. You are so clear, firm, and compassionate. I believe this will help me better recognize the dynamics of narcissists and find that middle ground to approach them.
  • Not available avatar Sneha Nikam 07.07.2012 07:44
    Interesting and learning presentation. Thank You.
  • Not available avatar roberta logwood 07.07.2012 15:09
    In full agreement w/note posted above: one of the BEST webinar presentations by the Networker ever. (Thanks Rich!) I too paused the tape many times - in order to inhale and store Wendy's smart smart theory, and then to simply admire and appreciate stunning practice wisdom. Well met. And thank you.
  • 0 avatar Diane Perris 07.09.2012 15:27
    Absolutely another "wow!" I am working with two clients right now, both male, who fit this profile and I am ready to begin to change my approach towards focusing on what's happening in the room. I find it particularly powerful to think about my own triggers and subsequent response patterns with narcissists (freeze, flee, or appease).
    Dr. Behary, if you are still reading the blog, 3 questions: 1) Does this type of narcissism present the same way in women? 2) What do you think of Gregory Lester's (presenter on personality disorders) description of folks with PD's as missing "fundamental pieces of personality architecture"? His take is that while a narcissist can learn some new behaviors, including empathy, accountability, and access to feelings, it will be limited due to experiences that were never wired in early enough. 3) Steven Carter and Julie Sokol, in their book "Help! I'm in love with a Narcissist" describe a different presentation called the "Wounded Narcissist". In this case, the client appears very emotional, tearful, desirous of help, insightful, and needy but is still just as self-absorbed, mistrustful, and unable to give. Do you see this as a type of narcissism? THANK YOU!!
  • Not available avatar gail harris 07.09.2012 22:52
    Thank you, Dr. Behary, for a most stimulating presentation. I esp. appreciated your skills in using session #! as confrontational session, yet there was never a doubt that you were compassionate and most caring in the use of the client and the relationship within the room. I enjoyed the various techniques of using photos, a parental inventory; and esp. the use of the flash card(i.e.:iPhone voice messages )....
    I would like to have heard a few ways in which you have used memory activation , if you are still responding.. A wonderful hr.....Many thanks...
  • Not available avatar AD 07.10.2012 10:38
    Thank you Wendy for being so thoughtful and generous with your presentation. Looking forward to hear more of your presentations in the future. Your website is also fantastic, thank you!!!
  • Not available avatar Irene Savarese 07.10.2012 11:43
    Thank you for a fantastic interview. I learned a lot!
  • Not available avatar Sharon Kocina 07.10.2012 16:22
    I agree with everyone above. I also want to add that this series, so far, has been the best series since I started listening to your webinars. I've recommended it to several of my colleagues.
  • Not available avatar Wendy Behary 07.13.2012 12:32
    Thank you again - all of you - for your interesting questions and most thoughtful responses!
    I am so pleased to know that the program was helpful to you, and I am delighted to answer questions. I will follow-up with you shortly... Please also feel free to email me: wendy.behary@gmail.com

    Warmest Regards,
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