NP0020 Men in Therapy: What Clinicians Need to Know

This blog focuses on discussion regarding the course NP0020 Men in Therapy: What Clinicians Need to Know.

Men and Sexuality: Challenging the Myths with Esther Perel


Men in Therapy: NP0020 - Session 4

Explore the poorly understood world of male sexuality by challenging some of the pervasive myths about men and their “nonrelational” attitude toward sex. Esther Perel, author of Mating in Captivity and specialist in sexuality and couples relationships, ascribes practical tools for helping men examine their own sexual blueprint.

After you hear this presentation, please take a few minutes to comment about what you found most interesting or relevant, to ask any questions you have of the presenter or your colleagues, or to share any experiences. As always, if you ever have any technical questions, please feel free to email support@psychotherapynetworker.org and our Support Team will help you.

06.12.2012   Posted In: NP0020 Men in Therapy: What Clinicians Need to Know   By Psychotherapy Networker
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  • 0 avatar Al Bright 06.13.2012 03:55
    I love these Webcasts but I was astonished at Simon's continuous questions related to... What does this REALLY mean? and What's really happening for the client here? and At the session's end what's the client REALLY getting out of this; and We need to slow down and try to understand this, etc., etc. What's not to understand?!! Perel's answers were consistently clear and I think profoundly important. I don't understand Simon's questions.
    I have always known that my growth in life - both positive and negative- has been clearly represented by and expressed in my sexual experience, and my personal therapy has been enriched by my developing understanding of my sexuality and how my sexuality speaks volumes about how I have lived my life's failures and successes. Granted, I have a lot of Psych training and experience but it is abundantly clear to me that Perel's clients can learn just as much and more as I have learned through the deeper understanding of their sexual experience. And I had to learn it without the elegant support of an Esther Perel. You truly do "Get it" Esther and you are an inspiration. Thank you both for this important presentation.
    Al Bright
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 06.17.2012 12:23
      THank you Al. send me your contact info if you'd like more from me.
  • 0 avatar Shirley Hanson 06.15.2012 23:51
    I am so glad I am taking this course through Webcasts. The subject of Men in Therapy is an area for which I have needed help for years. I am afraid I have brought my own personal biases about males into the therapy room. I know I will need to listen to Esther Perel several times before I get her entire message, because it was foreign and abstract to me.

    On another note, I wish this series of webcasts had the slides that accompanied the presentation, since I learn better with both auditory and visual input. I would have liked to hear/see what Dr. Perel has written and how best to get further information.
    Thank you for this valuable information.
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 06.17.2012 12:18
      Hello, my book is entitles Mating in Captivity: Unl;ocking Erotic Intelligence, on my website you will also find three other articles on desire in couples, long term effects of infidelity and erotic Fantasy. They all include lots of my thinking about men and men in therapy. The material of this webinar is in development and has not yet been put in final written form. I also do multiple on-line trainings and you can find info on my website or send me an email at estherperel@me.com and I can send you one handout that may be useful to you. Esther
  • Not available avatar Carol McDermott 06.16.2012 17:15
    Wow! I get it! and wanted to hear again all the language that Dr. Perel uses in this interview so it turned into an hour and a half. Thank you both for a fine afternoon.
  • Not available avatar leticia 06.16.2012 21:51
    I would like Dr. Perel¨´s views and experiences of adressing male sexuality in other cultures. I personaly belong to a culture (Mexican) in which there are so many taboos and misunderstandings between couples that frequently lead to infidelity . So thank you so much to Rich and Dr. Perel for introducing this subject.
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 06.17.2012 12:21
      Hello Leticia,
      I am a cross cultural psychologist and have written and lectured widely about the intersection of cultures, couples and sexuality. THis is in fact my preferred nexus. Inteligentsia Erotica is the title of my book in Spanish( Mating in Captivity in English) and you can get it at the book store El Armario Abierto in Mexico DF.My next book is on infidelity from a y cross cultural perspective. send me your email if you would like more info.
  • Not available avatar Leslie 06.17.2012 12:04
    Esther, Esther, Esther. I am enlightened, left wanting more. I will review this webcast again and again. So much to digest and use. Thank you so much for your time.
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 06.19.2012 01:10
      Thank you Leslie. Estherperel@me.com if you want me to keep you informed on further trainings.
      always curious to know what specifically stood out and caught your attention.
  • Not available avatar Melanie 06.18.2012 01:43
    Dear Esther
    I am so grateful for the depth and breadth of your insights in this and the last interview you gave. There is a richness to your insights and cultural sensitivities that I deeply appreciate and derive great benefit from personally and professionally. I would certainly like to be put on your email list and will email you accordingly.
    Many thanks, Melanie
  • Not available avatar Holly 06.18.2012 10:16
    Thank you for a very thought provoking interview. I am intrigued enough to purchase your books and look for a training to participate in that will provide more depth. I am a couples' therapist that has trained with Terry Real and I think this is a fabulous additional area to explore for working with couples. Thank you for your work!
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 06.19.2012 01:12
      Thank you Holly. Estherperel@me.com if you want me to keep you informed on further trainings.
      always curious to know what specifically stood out and caught your attention. Check out my webinar with Terry Real from the PN symposium on infidelity.
  • Not available avatar Sneha Nikam 06.18.2012 11:55
    It was out of the box presentation, I was keenly watching it. I would like to describe it as intelligent bowling of questions by Rich Sir and Esther Ma'am brilliantly batted the answers with 4s and 6s. All my best wishes to both of you, Take care.
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 06.19.2012 01:13
      Thank you very much. I am moved. Estherperel@me.com if you want to stay informed re trainings.
  • Not available avatar Joy Lang 06.18.2012 18:49
    Thank you for another enlightening presentation Esther. I heard one of your sessions in a previous webcast as well, and I must say, you've really opened my eyes to what is happening in my office, both working with couples and men individually. Thank you so much again. I'm going to pick up your book
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 06.19.2012 01:14
      Thank you Joy. let me know what spoke to you and send me your email so I can include you on my mailing list if you wish
  • Not available avatar Victoria 06.19.2012 01:34
    Esther, as always you are provocative and thought provoking. You have a talent for uncovering that which too many of us miss, or fail to look deeply enough to truly illuminate and help our clients to discover. I share your belief that our sexuality is us; it is not a piece that can be understood as a separate aspect of ourselves. I particularly enjoyed the exercise/diagnostic technique you described in which the couple uses the language of the body to invite one and other to come closer, and was taken by the breadth of information so immediately apparent to you in movement, facial expressions and the non-verbal realm. Additionally, your translation of the French word for flirting--the tip of the sword--and the playful, engaging, anticipatory experience that teasing and flirting can bring alive in a couple's erotic life.
    Looking forward to your next book. Thank you!
  • Not available avatar Kelly 06.19.2012 12:36
    A very eye opening conversation. I stopped after just a few minutes and had my husband join me in watching. Wonderful conversation starter for my relationship and I'll surely be following up on your other work to bring more depth and insight into this aspect of my work with couples.
    Thank you!
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 07.15.2012 23:02
      Thank you Kelly. curious to know what stood out for you and for your husband.
      If you email me at estherperel@me.com, I can include you on my mailings to keep you informed.
  • Not available avatar Jude Blitz 06.28.2012 16:41
    I am listening for the first time to Dr. P and Dr. S speaking. I find her astonishingly clear, inspiring in the way she penetratingly understands deeper implications of behaviors, and gracious as she guides, by both indirection and incisive inquiry, the client(s) to recognize who -- which of their identities is showing up -- in intimate encounters. I learn from Dr. Perel's content and understandings, as well as from the container of respect, care and forthrightness she creates in her sessions.
    • 0 avatar Esther Perel 07.15.2012 23:03
      Thank you Jude for this generous feedback.If you want to know more, send me an email to estherperel@,me.com, I will keep you informed.
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